How Time Is Secretly Wrecking Your Relationships

During college, while studying for a marketing degree, I stumbled upon a graphic in a textbook that claimed all human problems fit into three categories: health, wealth, and relationships. It was simple yet profound, offering a clear framework for understanding what motivates people.

At the time, I believed any business addressing all three categories would be unstoppable. Yet, as I embarked on my entrepreneurial journey, I learned this was a pipe dream. Success came only when I narrowed my focus to security tech, targeting one category—health. Businesses that tried to straddle multiple arenas often faltered, proving the power of singular focus.

But one question lingered long after I’d moved on from that venture: Could there be a universal solution that transcends these categories?

Eventually, I discovered the answer. It’s not a product or service but something far more valuable and elusive—time.

The Problem of Time in Relationships

When we look at the daily struggles that affect our relationships, the common thread is often a lack of time:

• Too busy for hobbies that bring joy.

• Wrestling with weight and self-care, leaving little energy for loved ones.

• Struggling to connect with a spouse or partner.

• Grieving a loss with no time to process.

• Overwhelmed by stress, spilling into interactions with others.

• Crushed by debt, working long hours to make ends meet.

What ties these challenges together? Time.

We feel its absence acutely—a ticking clock that drives our choices, pressures our priorities, and limits our freedom. If you’ve ever thought, “If only I had more time,” you’re not alone. Even death itself feels like a battle against time’s constraints.

Here’s the irony: time is the one resource we can’t earn more of. 

Whether rich or poor, everyone has roughly 4,000 weeks on this Earth. How we spend those weeks determines not only our success but also the quality of our relationships and the legacy we leave behind.

Making Time for Relationships

If we can’t add more hours to our lives, how can we make the hours we do have count? It starts by thinking from the end.

I first encountered this principle in business, where it’s known as “back-casting.” Instead of planning from where you are to where you want to be, you imagine the future you desire, then work backward to map the principles that created that result.

For example, imagine your goal is to build a thriving, connected family. Rather than thinking, “I’ll spend more time with my kids someday,” picture the end result: a family where love and communication flourish. Then, you’d identify what made that possible—like consistent family dinners, heartfelt conversations, and quality time—and begin those practices today.

This approach isn’t just for business or families. It’s a powerful way to live a life worth living. Picture yourself at the end of your days. Who surrounds you? What stories are told about you? What did you prioritize? This vision shapes the decisions you make today.

Time Management Through Compassion

For me, the future I imagine is clear. In it, I am remembered as someone who loved deeply and acted compassionately. Yet, living with compassion demands time—time to listen, to care, and to act on behalf of others.

When I begin my day with the question, “What did future me do today?” the answer often points to compassion. Whether it’s pausing to play with my kids, investing time in my marriage, or checking in on a struggling friend, these choices may not seem productive in a world driven by money, but they’re investments in what matters most.

Compassion transforms how we view time. It shifts our focus from what we can get out of life to what we can give. And in the giving, we often find more joy, peace, and fulfillment than we thought possible.

Living in the Present With Time Management

Wisdom comes from understanding that our time is finite and using it wisely. This doesn’t mean cramming our days with endless tasks. It means approaching each moment with intentionality, valuing the people and opportunities God places in our path.

Tomorrow is never guaranteed on this earth, but today is a gift. How will you use it?

Until next time,
Addison